Confused

I don't really know what's going on anymore. My parents...I'm just really scared they will feel lonely when I grow up and have to leave. Sometime I dislike having my parents divorced, but when I think of it actually it's better this way.

It's all just confusing, lol. Maybe I'll work it out. Sooner or later.

On a brighter note, I got 72 for my moral final exam...I hope my other marks are good. Yes this mark was good but I know it could have been better. No point dwelling on it...When life gives you lemons make lemonade I guess. Or ice lemon tea.

Anyway. I think I'm gonna join orchestra in January... Going to my school counsellor to discuss my goals for high school. ^^ I hope it'll help.

Well, life has its ups and downs...Not much point moaning, groaning and refusing to let go. Yes my dad may be having some trouble, and I wish I could help him but he has Auntie Anita to confide in so I guess it's okay. At least he has someone. I'd rather he have someone because now that our tenants have moved out he's all alone in the house when I'm at mum's...I know how loneliness feels, and frankly it's terrifying. I don't want to have my dad go through that. Neither do I want my mum to go through that too. It's just a bit tougher cause I have to take care of both parent's feelings. But I'll manage! I promised a lot of people I would. So I will. But sometimes I have to raise a white flag, so bear with me when I do alright?

I'm sorry this post is depressing... I wish it could have been the other way around but I guess there's no helping it.

Wish me luck for the rest of my finals, and pray I make it through.

Ja!

Back to School

=.= Only Monday and Wednesday were school days for the past week. I think I'm suffering from schooling withdrawal symptoms. 0w0" Cripes, I must be going crazy. Well, finals are in ten days and I'm hopping around like a bunny high on Viagra or something... And anyway, I'm gonna study 6 hours a day. Not including tuition and school. Crazy, right? I'm turning into a robot. Or so Mamoru says. ^^ Yay! But since there are twelve subjects (English, BM, Chinese, Math, Science, Geography, History, PJK, Civic, Moral, Art and KH) of which I am not studying English and BM because there's no friggin' point, I am alternating between a set of subjects and another set of subjects. Effective I guess lol...I really shouldn't have left everything to the last minute. =.=

Anyway, I gotta go, and I'm sorry for leaving you with a short post today...

Ja!

Essence

My god, loads of my friends must be jumping seeing as it's PMR season... Lol. Exams, finals, SPM... All coming round to wreak havoc only I can dream of creating.

I sneezed so many times yesterday...I think it was like 25 times. -.- I honestly think I'm gonna fall sick. Or is it that the residues of the dust storm at Sydney have come here?

It's so confusing ne, how people think...it's really intriguing. I mean, what other animal has such cruelty in them? The complications, everything... Life is so short but it seems so long at times. Seriously la...I get amused by the things that come out of my mouth at times. Yay I'm vulgar and crude...

Stanleigh's new name is Jenkins Stanleigh~ Lol. New name, new life. ^^ Congratz Stan!!!

Ugh...two monthly tests on Thursday...History and Geography. Lol. I'm gonna die~ Who decided to do that anyway? Studying one is bad enough, but two? =.= I really have to get high on Oreos to do that.

And not to mention that my piano teacher is requesting that I get a real piano... >.< I'm poor, so in the meantime I'm gonna practise in my digital, stay back at piano to use the awesome Wagner there and perhaps ask my friend for help...

My church is requesting that I re-join orchestra...Should I? I have karate on Sunday mornings...if I join i have to go for practice on Sunday afternoon. Hmm...I feel bad because my dad doesn't really get to see me that often... And anyway I think I'll die from exhaustion. *sigh* I don't know...maybe I'll alternate weeks then. *sob*

I have just discovered a love for the arts~ Music, writing, art, martial arts, sewing, cross stitch, cooking, baking... Yes I know cross stitching is so grandma, but it's like meditating~ Lol. =.= I'm sad I don't really have the time for all that though. Even the art of politics and strategizing is fun~

Okay, I'll stop crapping and wasting your time... Ja!

Rotting At Home

=.= I really am a moron.

You wouldn't believe how furious I was, lol... My stupid transporter has the gall to come late, then come early and demand that I get off the car if I don't like it, then come even later by an hour... Then after I've walked home and called the stupid idiot of a boss, that stupid idiot of a boss threatens to tell my whole school how bad I am, just because I gave that very late transporter employee the finger. Would you even believe that she freaking cried? My god... There isn't much point telling the whole school anyway. They already know how bad I am. -.-" Really though, she called me up and threatened me...When I told her I was passing the phone to my dad she hung up. Yeah, I'm very nice to bully... Wait and see.

But it was okay la... My dad met D on Sunday.... It was so darned awkward and I wanted to kill myself on the spot. =.=

Well, school is back on Monday... All the same anyway. I'm suffering from carpal tunnel syndrome as a result of playng too much gameboy... Yes I know I'm outdated. But I'm poor... Lol.

I joined a band with Taka, Jane and Izzy...until CF decided not to have bands. And now Jane can't commit as usual... =.= What la... Irresponsible kid. But lol, Taka asked me to write a song...I'm, like WTFH... How the hell am I supposed to do that?

Then after that my piano teacher gave me the prolonged version of Jay Chou's Secret... >.< I'm supposed to play it at 128 beats per minute and I'm playing at 34... Even then, I make mistakes. Holy hell, Jay Chou really is one of a kind. Like I don't have enough on my plate already playing a couple of songs from Yiruma and composing for Taka. =.=

I'll just rot at home la... It's not like I have anything else to do. Life is complicated, interesting, boring... It's amazing how versatile it is. ^^

Oh, and happy raya! I know it's a bit late, but who cares? It's the thought that counts... And happy mooncake festival to all them people who celebrate it~ Raya and Mooncake Festival almost back to back is feeding me sweet stuff like a sugarholic, lol... I'm gonna be fat then. Christ, I don't even fit my miniskirts properly anymore... Really gotta go for more karate. Haiz.

Ja!

School Is Really Fun

I never really knew how fun school could be...I mean, some people are just so darn easy so manipulate. I'm glad I don't manipulate my friends though. Just my enemies. ^^

Well, it's that time of the month again....and monthly tests are back. And on the 20th of October, it's the finals...I really have to study for them, cause I have a few peopleI wanna defeat academically. Lol, at this rate even my dad is going to call me a bitch...I know for once that my mum already does.

I got my costume back~ I'm so happy. The hoodie looks a little wrong because the body is black instead of grey, but there isn't really much point complaining...It's really good quality, lol... So instead of getting scammed I got a really good quality costume the will last me ages. Until I wanna sell it. But I don't think I will...It's so nice and it's my first costume, anyway. I have to keep slim, though...the shorts are kinda tight around my ass. I guess the guys at Comic Fiesta will get a free show? -.-

Well, my dad found out about D... He wants to meet him. DX I'm gonna die at this rate... But D is kinda well qualified...I mean, who wouldn't like a guy who's nice and studies? Lol...he said the other day that he's studying just for me. ^^ I'm so flattered. I hope dad like him...If not then I have to get nasty.

Tomorrow we in Selangor are going back to school~ I'm gonna have fun manipulating a certain bitch/wannabe/brown noser/bimbo... I mean, what kind of moron show everyone her book of tactics? In a war you can't afford to be that stupid, dear...I just hope you understand how really idiotic you are.

Well, I gotta go...Study time! ^^ Have fun, guys...it's going to be the end of the year~

Nonsensical Rubbish...

I am so freaking bored...And to be honest, I haven't really been studying. Lol.

I'm currently at my mum's colleague's place, and suffice to say, this family absolutely loves having steamboat for dinner. I really have to agree, though...their steamboat is sublime.

^^ I've pretty much cut out and stuck all the bits of my shuriken~ Now there's just detailing and spray painting to do... I think the arms are a bit short though...it look kinda weird...but I have to continue, it's not like I'm going to just chuck the thing...even though I'm sorely tempted to. Lol.

Well, I hope everyone's fine... And I hope that Life is treating everyone well, because if it isn't I'll do my best to beat it up. Lol.

Ja!

Miscommunication~

Lol...

I won't normally do this but a particular guy is just plain cracking me up. Let's call him Ja?

So I added him in MSN and we chatted....and I was talking about J. Then I switched topics and started to talk about random stuff... And the guy decided to ask me what J does to make me....you know.

So we chatted for a bit more... And I realised that he thought J a.k.a. X was my boy instead of D a.k.a. A. What the heck... Lol, this just made my day.

Short post...

Ja!

School Holidays Rock

Hi!

I love the school holidays... The time off lets me plan and clear my head. It's an awesome feeling, don't cha think? Once everything is decluttered...it's like you're a Zen Buddhist, floating around in your own head. I feel more serene already. ^^

But like the calm before a storm, I know that it's all going to get turned upside down and shaken about... So I'm just bracing myself for the hurricane that is going to unleash itself.

Lol...I'm still being so philosophical.

The Cockroach Killer srikes again! ^.^ I happily murdered a flying cockroach with my trusty aerosol cans, but I think I sprayed too much...you can smell the Ridsect from the corridor outside. CFC alert!

Well...six more days to the start of the second term.... Finals are coming up and it' time to study or I'll never get my freedom. But then again...apparently I'm smart (lol perasan) so a little studying, one hour a day should be enough.

Ja, and have a nice day!

First blog post, lol... Random.

Lol. School hols are up...and I finally have the time to make my shuriken. But it's kinda tough....I really have to buy a proper blade to cut that cardboard properly.

Well...I have stuff to study. And random other things to do... Like plan for someone's downfall. I'm so mean. ^.^ But i'm completely unrepentant...sometimes you have to be mean in order to survive in this cruel cold world. Lol. Besides, i'm learning survival skills... Let's see if what my karate sensei said is true... He said i had fire in my spirit or spirit in my fire or something... So i'll do my best and see what happens, ne?

Life feels odd nowadays... Since I'm not really friends with Jane anymore, and since i've decided to break off with some other people i refuse to name for confidentiality's sake... Yeah, life is odd nowadays. Hmm...it's the start of a new life, a new day... A new era. Lol, I sound so philosophical. Geez, what's with the big words, anyway??

Okay...I think i'll start properly blogging next week... On Tuesdays and Thursdays if possible.

Ja!